We hear it all the time; our problems are intended to help us become a better version of ourselves. But let's get honest... when 'the fit hits the shan', it isn't very easy for us to accept the idea that it's all happening for our greater good.

For those of us who really try, it can be extremely difficult to find the silver lining in some of our problems. In the midst of chaos how do we really practice the idea of becoming better rather than bitter?

I think the key word here is 'practice'. Embracing our problems as tools for our greater good requires consistent practice. Wouldn't it be cool if when things went wrong we immediately looked for the silver lining? Imagine skipping past all the hurt, pain and anger and instead jumping right into the idea of, "What's this really all about?" How would doing this impact your life? Doesn't it feel like the fast track?

I love the advertisement for donating blood, "It's in you to give." I completely believe that the same is true for our life's purposes.

Gosh, what is our life's purpose? Such a huge question isn't it?

There are so many answers but you really just have to pick the one that feels right for you.

Here are a few that I love because I don't really believe there is only ever one answer:

Is it possible to turn a negative situation into a positive?

Well, it depends on your mindset and how you choose to perceive the people and circumstances in your life.

Very recently I realized that I believed this was possible but I wasn't actually living it. As I was reflecting on this idea, I realized that for many situations in my life, when things go wrong or when someone hurts me, I still revert to the same old behaviors of either blame or victim. "Why is this happening to me? Why aren't things working out for me? Why does this person behave in that way?"

Repetition is far more important than I ever imagined it to be.

The spiritual law of repetition states that anything done over and over and over again becomes predominant. So whether you are trying to create a new habit or form a new thought system, repetition is key.

Imagine that you are walking through a forest. Every day you walk down the same trail. You have been doing this for years and so the trail is clear. There are no obstacles.

But now imagine if you decide it's time for a change. You want a new trail but in order to make a new trail, it means blazing a whole new path and the forest is very thick. You understand that the new trail will take some work and commitment but you decide it's worth it.

I recently read a Facebook post from one of my friends. She said something like, "People always ask me how I get these really cool speaking gigs. I tell them... 'Because I ask!'"

How many times have you secretly wanted something in your life but never asked for it?

Most of the time, what we want is right at our finger tips, but it requires us to get a little uncomfortable. In order to get what we want, we'd have to step out on a limb and ask for it. Uh, uh... no way, sometimes that's just way too scary right?

The reasons we don't ask for what we want is because when we think about asking for what we want, these are just some of the stories that play out in our head...

Hi my name is Carmen and I was a diet-holic.

There's something about that statement that can silence a room. I totally get it though, why would we want to talk about our pain when we can engage in small talk? And let's face it; it's a heck of a lot easier to talk about the weather than it is to talk about our deepest pain. Even more, we're not always greeted with open arms when we talk about what's hurting us... our pain often makes others uncomfortable.

So, we put on our mask and we live our lives as if nothing is wrong. It feels like this is the sensible way and it certainly feels like it's the easiest way. But yet when we're alone and we take off our mask, our pain is always there to greet us. It doesn't go away, despite our best efforts to ignore it.

It seems we have so much going on in our lives that some of us don’t make the time to stop and check our happiness gauge. I had a client once who told me she was unhappy for 17 years but had been too busy to notice.

Is this true for you? When was the last time you asked yourself if you were happy? And I don’t mean just a little bit happy or kinda sorta happy; I mean really happy? The thing is, a big part of our life’s purpose is to be happy. Nobody is doomed to a life of unhappiness.

I was sure I had stooped to an all-time low the day I ate my daughter's left over chicken nugget off the dirty floor of my mini van. Here's how it all went down..

I was having a day from hell, one of those days where I spent the entire morning yelling at my kids to get their clothes on, their shoes, their sweaters... "hurry up, we're gonna be late!" Next it was the car seat challenge, I don't know about your kids, but mine insist on getting into their seats all by themselves. In theory, this is nice, it displays independence as well as exercises motor skills, but when mommy is in a rush because she hit the snooze button one too many times... well you get my point. I'm not expecting any "mother of the year" awards, that's for sure.